• Lena Jennings

Deeper.

For some reason the air outside feels different. I can breathe again and maybe I credit it to the elections being over, I credit it to being in Tulum (blog to come on my experience), or the fact that my birthday just passed. But I've been reflecting a lot on my experiences and man has this been a year. It's been a year for obvious reasons: COVID-19, unexplainable loss, unnecessary death, dramatic declines in the economy, grief over the loss of our sense of normalcy, rage over police brutality, and the list goes on. But as I enter into my 24th year around the sun I begun to intentionally reflect on what the past 365 days brought me.

Although this year was one that we all quickly wrote off as the worst year yet, I realize that this has been my favorite. Everything that I thought brought me joy such as all of my involvements, my crazy busy schedule, traveling, and constantly being on the go was stripped away. I was stripped down to just me, my health, and my heart. Someone asked me if this was a year of questions or answers and as I think about it, it's a year of answers. I found out who I was, just me and all of my glory. So much has changed for the better and I've been able to experience all of my favorite things on a deeper level. From community, to God, family to growth, love to heartaches, surrender to purpose. I went a few notches deeper in my journey of life.


First and foremost I've felt incredibly connected to true friendships who feed my soul , who allow me to show up and be seen, and who 100% stand for me. I've been able to hold conversations with friends on topics related to the heart, purpose, and pain that bonded us even closer together as friends turned family. I've been able to connect to my family in ways that are answers to my 3 year long prayer: we have Sunday brunches, my sisters come over more, and we have joint holidays with my extended family. I feel connected to my purpose and emboldened through the moments I'm able to put it into practice. I've started a bible study group to deepen my faith with peers, I've relaunched Personable and I pushed myself out of my own comfort zone. I was able to fill my time with things that I wanted to do out of purpose not obligation. So yes I'm grateful despite the chaos of this year because this year I went deeper into being more authentically myself.


So what does deeper look like in practice? For me it's doing the same things I've always done but devoting more time and energy into cultivating them. I was able to strip away all of the fluff and distractions to make room for my roots to grow down deeper and space to plant new seeds. 2020 came straight from a horribly written reality show with a series of unfortunate events but if you really read in between the lines you see that this is a beautiful drama that has taken place. We can find so much good if we just take the time to appreciate the world for what it is. For we know that all things work together for the good of those that love him so all things this year have been good -- find them. And if you seriously cannot find the good, create it for others. I am believing and declaring that for the rest of 2020 we are gong to have the best year yet, that each day is going to be better than the last, and that from here on out goodness will follow us all the days of our life!

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